Blogs! – Page 13 – Swift's Corner

Thank You, Casey.

I know it’s been some weeks since I’ve written here, and that I’m on hiatus until next year, but I wanted to update y’all on a bit of my life… and to give myself a bit of healing after a tragedy.

My oldest dog, Casey, died a couple days ago. I’m still coming to terms with that, and the only way I really know how is to tell a story. So, here we go:

Casey Jones Swift (07/15/11-11/30/23) was an unexpected puppy. Literally. When Sarah and I were looking for a dog, I was adamant about having a golden retriever. I always wanted one. We were insanely lucky to find him, and because he was a ‘love puppy’, part of an unscheduled litter, we were able to get him at a price that I could afford. We thought about it, talked about it, and agreed that “Red” (the breeder’s name for him, based on his bandana’s color) would be part of our family. I took one look at him and called him “Casey Jones”.

We drove up to Tennessee, picked him up, and welcomed him into our lives. I’ve heard the phrase “Dogs are with you for a short time, but you are with them their entire lives” to show that we need to be grateful and kind to them. What that phrase does not show, however, is that the short time they are with us can mean the world to us. I wouldn’t grasp that until very recently.

Casey about to discover the joy of couches.

I called him a ‘gun dog’ as he grew up because he was a true companion of a pet. He didn’t take to formal training but learned all of my personal cues and commands for things. As a puppy, he was chaotic and a ball of energy. Goldens, in case you don’t know, are known to hold on to their ‘puppy stage’ mindset a lot longer than other dogs. Casey was a puppy all his life.

But also like other Goldens, Casey was sweet to people, and patient with other dogs. Even when a second Golden joined the pack: Joseph ‘Jojo’.

Casey being Big Brother to the second Old Man.

Casey grew used to me working long hours and made me make up for it by spending a LOT of time playing, walking, and roughhousing.

When Jojo joined the pack, he became a bit calmer and helped the young one learn how to be a proper Swift.

Casey being patient with his little brother.

As the years passed, the family grew. He met the new humans that joined the pack and treated them with the same love and patience he had shown everyone else.

It wasn’t until a few years ago that Casey started “showing his age”. When he was 8, he started making sure that he was always nearby us instead of chasing squirrels in the yard. He kept that habit up for the rest of his life.

He was diagnosed with heart problems and was put on a daily medicine that, I think, prolonged his life for a couple of years. But those years showed just how much he had aged.

On November 30, 2023, I came home from work knowing that my Old Man wasn’t feeling good. His hip dysplasia was hurting (I knew, because my knees were hurting) and he wasn’t wanting to eat. I had my suspicions but was confident that we would make the vet appointment the next day. I told Sarah I’d sleep on the couch so our Old Man wouldn’t have to walk to the bedroom, since he pretty much followed me everywhere I went nowadays.

At 8:20PM, Casey started coughing. I jumped off the couch, ready to help him. He gave a struggled breath, looked up at me as cradled his head, and…

I watched the light in his eyes leave.

I wasn’t ready. I broke.

I held him in my arms and broke. I cried and keened. I was not ready to have this part of my soul leave. I didn’t want it to happen. I didn’t understand at that moment that my friend was going away. I didn’t want to.

But Casey… was gone. He had said his goodbyes… and it was his time. He gave us twelve years of his life and love.

We will cherish every moment. He was a good boy. The best.

-JB Swift

09/03/23 Fear of the BFM

Today’s weekly posting is writer-focused, so if you’re confused, don’t worry; we are all.

I’ve been whittling away at my WIP for about 7 months now (I think?) and while I’ve consistently made progress on it, I started to hit snags of doubt and concern.

-Why are the characters starting to feel stilted and unrealistic?
-Why do I keep stopping short of finishing a chapter?
–Why does this feel like it’s moving too fast?

These are all valid questions and should be looked over. I’m what the writing community calls a “plotter”. My best work comes from having laid out the story is a format, most likely an outline, that I can go back to and see what’s coming up.

Occasionally, I’ll come across something in the outline and realize that a section would be better in a different chapter, so I’ll shuffle things around while they’re still ahead of me.

But then I’ll realize that I’m spending more time on the outline than the story, and I’ve added notes to previous chapters.

What’s going on here?

I’ve hit the point that is in every story and the one that will, most often, tempt me to leave the WIP:

The BFM.

What is the BFM? When I first learned the acronym, it meant “Big Fuzzy Middle”. I started learning the Writing Craft when I was very young, obviously. Now it’s the Big Fucking Middle, and it’s absolutely terrifying.

I’ve lined up all of the plot points for the story, and I’ve lined up how they’ll all collide, and then fallout afterward. But there’s that one section of a story where it’s just before these points collide, and my confidence wavers.

So what did I do? I retreated, told myself I should go back to those previous chapters and put in the notes I’ve come across or wrote up recently. I’ll add and add to the previous chapters without ever meeting that BFM.

Because that’s where the imposter syndrome lurks and where I worry if the story will be good enough.

How do I combat this? I could, of course, just dive into the BFM, write out everything I have in a frantic hurry, and run for the finish line. That’d get the WIP done, sure. But it’d make a self-fulfilling prophecy and ensure the story’s own demise.

So…what to do?

From one unpublished writer to the others that wander onto my site: have faith.

Now, before you roll your eyes, understand that my own are already delivering the snark to my own advice. It’s annoyingly trite, especially when you’re stepping into the BFM and marinating in the imposter syndrome, but it’s also true.

I’m having to tell myself this, so I might as well tell y’all, too: if you’ve made it this far into the novel, you should finish it. Yes, there’re things you need to go back to and write in, but that won’t make the BFM any smaller. Take the chapters to a beta reader and get their take on it. If you know one, take it to an editor. You don’t need to tackle all of these things on your own.

Stay with your story and keep going. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. You’ll get to the finish line eventually.

Stay safe out there, readers.

-JB Swift

08/27/2023 Weekly Write-Up!

In giving myself a bit more time to think on how I’d go about my daily posts becoming weekly, I would like to say I had used such to come up with a more in-depth analysis of how the writing and gaming has been.

In truth, I mostly slept during that free time.

But I did make some progress! Mostly focused on my non-scheduled day from the post office, when I told myself that for once, I would be doing what I actually wanted to do instead of lining up a list of random chores.

Resulted in nearly 2,500 words to “Peregrine: Rising” and a much more in-depth look at the upcoming gaming sessions.

Note to self: Fill out the Session Schedule up to the hiatus.

Now, there is a slight deviation from my statement of once-a-week postings that I’ve been considering: reviewing the old Star Wars Expanded Universe (now called Legends) novels. I might set these for Wednesdays, since I somehow always find a lull during that day where I’m not much up for writing but instead, would like to be a nerd with my nerdy old books.

So, if I manage to remember, keep an eye out as I take a look at “X-Wing: Rogue Squadron”.

With that, I’m off to handle a birthday party at a bowling alley.

Stay safe out there, readers!

-JB Swift

08/20/2023 Books, Writing, and Gaming!

I maintain that I would be starting this Sunday for weekly posting, but I have to admit that I only gave myself three days to start the routine, so this one will be a little rough.

We managed to get to the SWRPG Main Arc session on Saturday, but after 5 days of 10hr shifts, I barely made it into 3 hours of the game before the party, in their wonderful graciousness, flat-out told me to go to bed and rest.

(I slept for 11 hours, so maybe they were right)

Now, I will continue to host sessions through September and hopefully into October, but they’re going to be sparse leading up to the real Heavy Season time. I’m hoping to finish Arc 3 “War Diaries” before the cut-off time, so we’ll have to see how well I plan out my sessions in that time.

Meanwhile, I’m wanting to also finish Zino’s Solo Arc “Trouble in Ord Trasi” before that cut-off time, so Zino! Be ready for a session soon!

A quick aside, but Han has reached the point in here Kung Fu training that she’s ready for weapons, so the Sifu and I got her a gift: her own staff.

*I’m going to get hit in the head so many times.*

Writing-wise has been hit-or-miss this week, unfortunately. When the day job shifts were more consistent with the 8hr limits, I was more inclined to whittle away at my stories, but now that it’s looking to be more like 10hr shifts for the rest of the year, I’m going to have to use an older method to parcel out my writing times. I’ll be setting aside each day of the week for something to write in, except for Sundays (as that is for here).

And that is also being besieged by a very fun distraction: D&D world-building and Creation Mythology crafting thanks to picking up a book that I knew, I just knew, would put these ideas in my head.

*Can you tell I’ve read this a few times?*

In an odd way, the Dungeon Crawl campaign world is based off one of the Creation Myths I had written some years ago, but never got around to finishing. But as I’m getting back to Fantasy writing, that old, old itch has come back and I went through my bookshelf for one of my oldest surviving journals.

*A gift from my brother and his family; I’ve added to it slowly over the years.*

I expect this little craze to die down over the next few months, but it will result in a few nights of not adding to my current stories while I keep figuring out a Tolkien-esque mythology that is also completely ‘my own’. Yes, I’m also writing out a new language, just to see if I can.

There’s also a new challenge for me! The SWRPG campaign has a PODRACE!

There are no real rules withing the Revised Edition for podracing, so I’ve been having to make my own! Will it work? Well, I tried it once before, but that was very much-so a draft idea, so I’ve been researching to perfect the challenge.

(Pray for Lina, folks)

With that, I’m off to cook a dinner and plan out my week.

Stay safe out there, readers!

08/16/2023 Heavy Mail Season is Upon Us!

It’s a rare enough occasion for what I call the “Heavy Season” to start early.

To give context, the US Mail has its seasons like any other part of humanity. From January to March, it’s the Winter’s Light Season, leading up to the Tax Season from March to May. From May to September, it’s the Late Summer Light Season, followed by the Heavy Season that, usually, starts on October 1 and ends in the first week of January.

But the mail has been getting more ‘focused’ lately. Parcel counts are high, and lettered mail, for all that it’s at bulk pricing, is getting burdensome.

The Heavy Season is starting early, it looks like. With that comes some bad news.

I’ll soon be so busy with work that I won’t have time to work on my RPG plots. Hell, I’ll barely have time to write. As much as I wish I could make daily posts, I’ll be having to go to weekly (Sunday) postings starting soon and until January.

I don’t like that kind of news, but I have to be honest, readers: I’m exhausted. The high heats of the summer are wearing me out, and I’m predicting an upswing at the office.

(This post was scheduled when I get word from a supervisor that I was about to be handed multiple 12-hour shifts in the coming weeks)

For everyone used to my daily posts, I apologize and will get back to the routine as soon as I can. I’ll put in an effort to write throughout the week, and at least focus on an essay for my Sunday Posts, but I can’t promise much more than that.

I’ll be setting up my last few sessions for the year to end by October, and will write up a post for 08/20.

Stay safe out there, readers.

-JB Swift

08/11/2023 I’m Alive! I’m here!

I’m still alive!

Apologies for not posting in so long, everyone. I’ve been exhausted from the day job and haven’t thought to put up anything in a while.

But I do have a ton of photos to add to my albums, and I have been writing!

Here and there, when I’m lucid enough to do so.

So, some news!

My SWRPG group are way too wonderful of group of people and pooled their money together to help me get a mesh router system, so I now have a steady internet connection! This has allowed me to switch my gaming over to Discord! It only took me ten years!

(Considering how I am with taking up new things, that’s actually pretty quick)

I’ll be updating everything when time (and endurance) allows, but for some players who may be out of the loop, especially my Solo Arc players, I’ll be messaging you to bring you up to speed. (If it hasn’t happened by next Monday, tell me and I’ll try to wake up)

I’m going to try to write a bit before the heat of the day catches up with me.

Stay safe out there, readers!

-JB Swift

07/24/2023 New Page!

Decided to use the early half of the morning to publish a couple pages that, in all honesty, I keep forgetting to make Public.

But since we’re getting back into D&D (not so much that it interferes with my writing), I should start putting up the info that players will be wanting!

Go peruse! It’s not much at the moment, I’m afraid. I have a writing sprint to jump into.

Stay safe out there, readers!

-JB Swift

07/23/2023 Full House once more

We got home way too late to pick up the animals from boarding, but I made sure that everything was ready for them when they arrived.

After the initial ‘why are y’all acting like puppies still, you’re both over ten years old’, the Goldens got right back into their routine.

That routine being absolutely adorable.

Gonna be a quiet night for me, folks. Campaign writing.

Stay safe out there, readers!

-JB Swift

07/22/2023 Homeward Bound

It was fun, Richmond. But it’s time we were home.

*Louisiana sure knows how to welcome its people back.*

We have settled back into home, having tumbled the kids into their beds. I’ve managed a few writing sprints and am debating having one more, but as tired as I am, I should admit that I’m done and just head for bed.

I’ve now jinxed myself and will be asleep at my desk this evening, but if I manage to get something else written down, it will be a remarkable achievement. Tomorrow will be a day of site maintenance and scheduling the next sessions.

Stay safe out there, readers.

-JB Swift

07/21/2023 The High Kings!

It’s been a hell of an evening, everyone!

We went to see the High Kings!

(Irish supergroup known for playing a lot of the older folk music)

*Sarah was gorgeous and ready, I was running on the ‘get ready in 5 minutes’ mindset.*

But I did make myself ready, and if I’m going to see a group of Irish singers, I’m going to make the effort!

*I felt relaxed and confident. Also very breezy.*

It was a couple hours of old music that I’ve memorized years and years ago, but damn good to finally see it played live.

Personal funny note: when we were getting the shirts signed, I said ‘thank you’ in Irish, and introduced myself as Jacob. The singers gave me a smile and said ‘Well done, Seamus’, which was my nickname while in Ireland.

A damn good night, all in all. But it’s now late and I’m exhausted. Gonna fall asleep watching “The Day After Tomorrow” and enjoy making the commentary the film provokes.

Stay safe out there, readers!

-JB Swift