Month: April 2023

04/12/2023 D&D Films and Story Progression

It’s been a long time since I went to the movies, so when a fellow nerd asked me to go with him to see a film, I thought (read: was told by my wife) that I needed to get out more.

The fellow nerd told me something that made me intrigued:
“I really want to see the new Dungeons&Dragons movie with a real D&D nerd.”

I’ve been a forever-DM (I don’t play characters, I just write the campaigns) for over 20 years now. I was exactly the kind of nerd my buddy was wanting to accompany him. That we saw the movie at 7:45PM (which is obscenely late for this near-40-year-old hermit) on a Wednesday night, so he, his other D&D nerd friend, and I had the entire theatre to ourselves, was also a benefit.

I sat down and basically became a gibbering fanboy for a couple hours. Here was a film that was speaking my language, and there was an audience (2 people is an audience, dammit) that enjoyed my shop-talk during quieter moments.

Without spoiling anything: there’s a Mimic in there! I was so happy to see it.

My friends enjoyed my analysis of the film, but I didn’t talk about the setup or CGI; I enjoyed the dialogue and plot elements. I saw spots where I said “The DM wrote themselves into a corner there” or “That is something a DM would want their players to go through”, and how the challenges were arrayed by Challenge Rating for the party.

I have to say: they did good work on this one. I’ll accept that a Druid can’t Wildshape into an Owlbear, but there was a friggin’ Owlbear! I’m going to be happy seeing it.

What will throw folks is that I’ve enjoyed every D&D movie made, because I know the editions they were based on. I’ve been playing since AD&D, and I’ve been DM-ing since v3.5. While I’m not where I want to be with 5th Edition, I know enough to know what to look for.

Don’t let the negative reviews sway your opinions, readers. They did good work with the new one.

But as it’s closing on midnight, and I’ll be heading to bed (read as: nodding off at my desk) fairly soon, I’ll close this post out with a simple declaration:

If you’re a D&D nerd, you’ll like the movie. They did it right.

“Queen’s Honor: Peregrine” First Draft: 2%

04/11/2023 A Full Half-Day and Insane Epiphanies

You’d be surprised how much thought I put into blog titles. I’m strangely satisfied with this one.

After a couple days away from the desk and enjoying time with my family, I’m back to my usual writing and plotting. We’re about to be in the “overtime is normal” period of the year and I’ll be working 10-12 hour shifts for 5-6 days a week.

You know it’s going to be rough when both the 7-yr old and the 5-yr old are looking at the calendar on the wall, asking when Dad’s workload will lighten. I’m hoping it’ll be late summer, so I can be around before school starts back up.

But Tuesdays are my half-days, so at least I can still take care of them in the afternoon on that day, and I’ll be able to take Han to Kung Fu in the evening.

Of course, since everyone knows I’m about to be largely absent except for Tuesdays and Sundays (I’m a career postman, so I don’t do parcel delivery like the new kids), that means we try to cram everything that we can into those few hours, including dinners with the grandparents or any errands that need me present. Tuesdays are about to be absolutely full of “Things-To-Do”.

Do what you can for your families, readers.

It was a quiet weekend in the writing world, as well. As much as I want to get everything done, it’s important to occasionally step back and look things over. That, and do chores.

The routine of chores can be oddly inspiring, at times. Maybe that’s just me, but I had stumbled across a few plot points while handling the dishes. It was one of those sudden moments when you stop what you’re doing, staring off into space, and the dogs give you very odd looks as you say “Ohhhh, that could actually work,” to no one in particular.

I must have been especially quiet until then, because even the hamster in her exercise ball paused to peer at me. There was a frantic rush to jot down the ideas in my notebook while they were still in my head, and I had to finish the evening chores. But I think I have figured out a crucial plot point that had been eluding me the past few weeks.

So, now I have two new things to try: First, giving myself a means to measure my progress. I’ve told myself that the science fiction story could be done at around 366 pages, so I can work towards a percentage amount of draft work every day.
Second, I’ve given some thought on a suggestion from my wife, Sarah. She’s seen me go through gaming sessions with new players and teach them the basics of character design and development, as well as DungeonMaster discussions on plot-writing and story-boarding. She said I should write out essays that cover these subjects and offer them for subscribers. That’s something to try, at least.

Stay safe out there, readers!
-JB Swift

04/07/2023 Good Friday

It was a quiet Holy Day at our house, which if I understand the day, is appropriate.

I’ve been giving some thought to writing an essay that explains the tradition and how I’ve interpreted it over the years. I might eventually do this, but for now, I’ve been reluctant to delve into religion on this platform. This is meant for writing, not proselytizing.

If y’all want me to write such essays, let me know. For now, I’m going back into my science fiction plotting.

Stay safe out there, readers.

-JB Swift

04/06/2023 Frantic Day and Furious Cats

It’s been a long, long day, readers. Not just for me, but for my son and our cat.

With a setup like that, you just know it’ll be interesting.

I went in to work knowing I was going to be struggling and trying to be done at a decent time. Han was talking about going to Kung Fu training all morning, though I had a feeling she’d be exhausted by then, so I didn’t push. She forgot that it was a half-day at school and she’d be spending the rest of the day with her grandparents, who have a small farm and no end of work needing done. She’d go into that with a will, which is always slightly frustrating.

Note: Figure out how to make cleaning her room seem similar to working in the garden.

What I wasn’t expecting was for my son to have a resurgence of strep throat, so the phone call of a fever and sore throat kicked up my drive to finish the route. There was no one who could drive him for a doctor visit, so I let my bosses know that I had a sick kid to take care of.

12 miles in under 6 hours with mail and parcels. My life is nothing but leg day.

But it was done, and Ben was seen by the doctor. He got a powerful antibiotic shot, which is just as uncomfortable as it sounds. But the boy is a trooper. He cried for a little while, was given a hug, and he went back to being his odd little self, just like his dad. It didn’t take long for the medicine to kick in, which made for a very exhausted 5-yr old who didn’t quite make it to his bed. I carried him the rest of the way.

Kung Fu training was before that, and Sifu has put me into learning Bung Bo (Crushing Step, I think). That’s a Long Form in Seven Star Praying Mantis, and Long Forms are leg-intensive.

And to round out the evening, Penelope needed a bath!

So…much…fury…

I might have to leave this post in Drafts for a couple days, but I’ll get it posted soonest!

Stay safe out there, readers!

-JB Swift

04/05/2023 Han’s ‘Regular’ Weather Photo and Story Progress

“Dad! Did you get a picture of the weather for me?” asked the 7-year old.

I was obliging, but she was confused.

Meteorology is disappointing to the kid.

“That’s the same thing you took last time!” she said, and was clearly frustrated by this. She’s just starting to learn about weather patterns, but unfortunately, she’s also in Louisiana. Our weather is…chaotic at best.

Today’s regiment in writing is focused on two things: the science fiction novel and updating characters in the Sidewinder Stories. The latter is not something I normally do, but after seeing players forget to update certain notes on their sheets (and thus being unable to survive an encounter) I’ve taken to checking on everyone and making sure they’re all up-to-date.

Might have to write up a “So You’ve Leveled Up” essay in the GameMaster Notes. Something to work on.

Stay safe out there, readers!

-JB Swift

04/04/2023 ‘Will Write For Food’

…sigh

I’ve finally went and set the thing up. I’ll be able to accept donations and for readers to pay for subscription content, which will namely be the books I’m working to get published and circulated, or essays I’ve worked on as bits of advice to other writers or folks in my lines of thinking.

I’ll be honest, readers: I’m not proud of the decision or action, but if it helps, the practicality of it all is too much to leave alone. That squirming bit of my soul doesn’t like to ask for money, and I know why.

I’m from the generation that was told, repeatedly, to ‘pull myself up from my bootstraps’. I’ve always believed that if I wanted something, I should work for it and earn it on my own merit. Keep in mind, readers, that this mindset is for me, personally. I’m not one of the folks that looks at someone who genuinely needs help and gives them that platitude. If you can help someone and make the world a better place, even just a little, you should do it.

Coupling that belief is a strong sense of obligation and practicality. Yes, I want to be a published author; I’ve wanted that since I was 12-years old. But I’m not a child with few responsibilities anymore. I have children of my own, and everyone in this house needs food to eat, clothes on their backs, and a safe place to sleep. I have the means to provide that, but doing so has two costs: I’m never home, and I don’t get to write as much as I need to in order to realize my dreams.

The first cost didn’t hurt so much when I was younger and only needed to look after myself. Granted, twenty years ago, delivering pizza was enough of a job to pay for a 2-bedroom apartment on my own. Bills weren’t an issue. Now, though, I hear my family say that I’m never there and that eats away at my soul. Expect an essay about that on Father’s Day. They need me, but I have to be gone for most of their day so they can have food on the table.

The second cost was something I sacrificed, once. I stopped writing for years, thinking I needed to set that dream aside and be a ‘respectable adult’. What followed that decision were years of depression and self-loathing. I needed to have an outlet for self-expression and making my world make sense. That’s what writing is for me, and many others. Plus, a purely selfish desire to see my name on a book in a store. I have to admit that I’ve wanted that for a long, long time.

I’ve been working back to my goals of being a present husband and father, and a published author, but when I realized that I could ask, and I do mean ask, readers to send funds to me, I saw a chance to lighten the burden. If I had the chance to devote more of my time, such a precious thing these days, to being at my desk and around my family, I just might reach my goal. With me being aware of that, I couldn’t ignore it.

So, there it is. If you’ve come across my website and thought me interesting enough to stick around, I’m asking if you could please donate, or when I have subscriber content that you’d please subscribe. I’ll do everything I can to return on your investment in me. I give you my word on that.

Stay safe out there, readers. Expect another posting for Han’s weather photo soon!

-JB Swift

Will Write for Food! (Donations appreciated to no end)

PS~ I do have a caveat to this request: If you’ve come here to read the Sidewinder Stories, or to read one of my fan-fiction ideas, those will never be subscriber content. For one, those are in universes that aren’t mine, so those aren’t things I can ask you to pay for. For two, I enjoy those stories on a personal level and I want my players to read their stories. They’ll always have access to their campaign in story-form.

04/03/23 Han’s Weather Photo and Back to Braiding

I told Han that I was getting back into the habit of my posts, and she was delighted. “Take a picture today!” she said as she jumped out of the car at drop-off.

Welp, I told her I would, didn’t I?

“Pretty!” says the 7-yr old, while the mailman says “Eugh.”

Along with that was a startling but familiar activity while we had dinner with my mother: without preamble, mom started braiding my hair.

“It’s long enough that you pretty much have to braid it,” she said, “or it’s going to just going to be messy.”

Damn, it’s been a minute since this happened.

During my extremely brief stint in college, I used to braid my hair in the morning. I never got the hang of it, but I could get to at least be comfortable. Guess I need to look up YouTube videos and teach myself all over again. Or maybe Han will try.

(There will be so many knots in my hair if I let her, but she’ll learn by practice)

But there’s mail to move, Kung Fu forms to practice, and a session to prepare for in the next day. Meanwhile, I can agonize over how to set up donations and subscriber content on this site. That’s a whole new anxiety, and that’s what life needs at my age: new experiences!

Stay safe out there, readers.

-JB Swift

04/02/23 Back to Work (Updates!)

All right, all right. I’ve been pretty quiet on this for a little while, and I’ve said repeatedly that I would get back to daily posts. Unfortunately, the last couple of times I have tried getting back in the habit, I’ve had things come up that demanded my attention. Hopefully, this time I will stick to it.

Foremost in my ‘distractions’, we had a bad scare among our animals. Korra, our youngest dog at age 8, was diagnosed with advanced pyometra and required an emergency surgery. The doctors told us she had a less-than 50% chance of surviving.

Day of surgery, and she was really weak from blood loss.

Sarah and I agonized over whether or not we’d attempt the surgery. There was no knowing if she’d survive going through the procedure, but we decided that our little water-wolf would try to survive as much as possible. We brought the family out to the emergency hospital and spent what time we thought we had left with the pup.

There were tears and confused questions from the kids, but even our 5-yr old knew that Korra was hurting and said he hoped she got through okay. It was a long, long day of awaiting the news.

Korra proved to be stronger than anyone expected.

She’s been recovering ever since, and had her sutures removed a few days ago. We’re still watching over her, and the vet warned me that the pyometra means she will inevitably be diagnosed with a cancer, but for now she’s energetic and yipping at me for attention.

Secondly in my distractions is the same duo that has plagued me for years and years: procrastination and imposter’s syndrome. It’s infuriating to know what your problem is even when it robs you of your creativity. But staring at this screen and being mad at myself isn’t going to get the work done, so I’m here making sure I’ve set aside the time to handle my writing and website maintenance.

I know Hannah’s been asking me to post her weather photos again, so at the least I need to write those again. Or the kid will get mad at me. There are a few essays I keep thinking to write but looks at above paragraph, I keep putting them off.

But hey, it’s Sunday. Good day to get back in the habit.

Stay safe out there, readers. I’ll have something for y’all tomorrow.

-JB Swift